A reader submitted a question to me in response to my comments in How to Welcome Church Visitors and with their permission, I share it with you:
We have a mid-twenties young man with minor learning difficulties, who likes to be at the door welcoming people, which is great.
He’s a tall guy, the entrance space is small.
He wears a leather jacket and chains, has a beard, and towers over people.
If I was a visitor, I’d probably find him intimidating… unless I belonged to his kind of social grouping, in which case I’d find it really welcoming to know that “people like me” have a place here.
Hence the conundrum – where is the boundary zone between accommodating people whatever they are like, and not intimidating newcomers?
I doubt there’s a right answer to the question, other than to identify in each location what is culturally ‘manageable’, and probably to ensure that there are several other different people with him so that newcomers see the ‘mix’ of greeters rather than just the intimidating guy.
What would you do if this was your your situation? Remember, I’m in Nicaragua this week, so I will not be answering comments but invite your discussion in the comments below.
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I think a mix of greeters is what is needed. If the newcomer sees the individual who seems to be different (by his dress) mingling with other greeters, they might not find him so intimidating.
Also there may be a more suitable ministry. For example, if the youth group leader is not just tending to church kids but actively reaching out to kids in local schools, this individual might be able to really relate to some that the church seeks to bring in.
If this brother is the only greeter, PTL that you finally have a greeter! The Lord has provided to meet your need and those of your visitors.
It is not easy to find someone with the heart, nerve and poise to greet strangers and make them feel welcome. But, the greeters and nursery workers make or break a church on growth. The decision to return is usually made within 20 minutes of entering the building and in most churches this means that it’s all over before the preached even gets started!!
I agree that “balancing” the first impressions by adding other greets of other styles it a great idea.
Have you offered the brother other clothes? Maybe its not that he would feel uncomfortable dressed differently; but that he has no other choice of clothing.
I am guessing that he and the other greeters have a badge to wear so first time visitor know why he (and they) are at the door AND so they know who they can count on for guidance in those first few uncomfortable moments at a new church.
If he doesn’t seem to want a different coat, (or anyway) maybe its time to provide logoed blazers or polo shirts or something for your greeters (and maybe the ushers to).
The shepherd David was the least qualified in all the camp Israel to meet Goliath and the entire camp was probably aghast about his being the one to go out and bring the Philistine “greetings” from the God of Israel. He tried Saul’s armour but it wasn’t right for him. Nevertheless he accomplished what God needed done.
P.S. In my town there was a particularly unsightly house. In a Solomon-like move, the town fathers asked the home owner to chair the town beautification committee. The unsightly house problem solved itself.