Church growth books on first impressions often stress the first 7 minutes of a visitor’s experience.
But this surprise result indicates that the something else is more important than first impressions.
Charles Arn has surveyed thousands of people: (Source: 3 Questions for Charles Arn)
We also asked the focus groups when they decided that the church was friendly or not.
From the answers we got, there’s a ten-minute window that is pregnant with opportunities for a church to make a good impression. And it wasn’t the ten minutes I expected.
I thought they would say it was right after they got out of the car and walked into the building, but more than any other time, folks said,
“I decided this was a friendly church in the ten minutes following the conclusion of the service.”
Many feel that that is the first time people are free to be themselves.
Up until that point, you go through the routine and enter the sanctuary and follow the directions. But when the last song is sung and the last prayer is prayed, then it’s a free-for-all, and in the minds of the visitors, they’re asking, “Will these people really go out of their way to welcome newcomers like me?”
Reflects my experiences making visits
Like Arn, I found this surprising, but it makes sense. The most important time is after the service not before.
When I am a first time visitor I am focused on the mechanics of
- getting to the sanctuary,
- getting a seat
- getting oriented to my surroundings.
- getting my children to the right place.
The ministry of church greeters, ushers and location of signs are helpful in accomplishing that task.
A task oriented mentality before the service starts narrows the focus to accomplishing the task, not to evaluating the friendliness of a congregation.
The more helpful the congregation is in getting that task done (greeters, ushers, signs) the easier I can begin to relax in the presence of total strangers.
After the service?
However, the 10 minutes after the service is entirely different.
I am now relaxed, ready to engage people, having heard a message, prayed, sang some songs.
I grab a cup of coffee and am now ready to talk with people about what I just experienced.
This is where the level of friendliness comes to clear view:
- Is any one approaching me as a first time visitor?
- Does any one want to talk with me?
Steps to improve your church hospitality after worship
In my ebook, How to Welcome Church Visitors, a whole chapter is devoted to these important ten minutes, including how to talk with visitors after the service.
These 10 minutes are not the time to conduct church business between members.
It’s time to talk with your church visitors and begin the possibility of new friendships.
The research shows that those 10 minutes after the service are the perfect time to take initiative and talk with your guests.
You could:
- Introduce yourself: “I’ve not met you yet, I’m Chris . . . . “
- Offer to pray with them right then if a need is shared.
- Offer to answer questions they might have about their experience.
These 10 minutes are about them — not about you or your church volunteer needs.
It’s not about the quality of your coffee or the freshness of the pastries (though that is important).
It’s about intentionally making connections after the service.
Next Step
Instead of locating all the articles on church hospitality on my website, consider my ebook “How to Welcome Church Visitors.” Follow the link with this banner and learn more about how that ebook can help you improve your systems.
clock photo credit: Βethan via cc
Do you have any non-Christian Friendships?
thanks pastor.your materials have added value to my service
I’ve enjoyed receiving emails from you. Glad I found you, you’ve helped a lot. God Bless and thank you.
thanks for all the mails you have been sending, they have been very encouraging. i meet with the women and the youth separately and i ask them what they will expect from a church during their first time. they were amazed for the many things they realized they will expect. this made them to see how they have not done the same to the many visitors we have been receiving. they willfully committed themselves to change, which i am very grateful of. thank you and may God increase your ministry.
Great this will really help me in my in house orientation for our Ushers tommorrow
Good resource
God bless
Sir I am sure your articles will help us a great deal.. I find them very useful, God bless your ministry, thank you sir.
Thanks for the good advice and helpful articles. I will use this with my staff.
God Bless
Thanks Jeff for stopping by last week.
In smaller churches in particular, I’m convinved more and more of the importance of these minutes when the service is over. Larger churches with hundreds of people, this may have less of an impact, but that’s intuition and my experiences in visitng larger churches ,rather than any statistical evidencce.
Thank you so much for the information shared here which I learnt. I hope it will help me to improve the level of hospitality in our church.
You are welcome. As you head to church this coming Sunday, watch to see if this principle is true for your congregation. I find that it is really important in smaller congregations.
Thank you so much. I am so certain that we will make a great impact on our visitors once we start applying these principles.
R P
Rachell:
Thanks for commenting. Is there one that you find most effective in your church as you’ve had some time to use these?
My church is fast growing with current workers and capacity requiring advancement. The materials on hospitality seem to be useful in improving our services.
Your work is great. May God bless you abundantly.
Thanks so much for this material! As a coordinator, this helps greatly!