Is relational evangelism a biblical method of doing personal evangelism?
Some critics of relational evangelism claim that there is no biblical evidence for a relational evangelism approach.
It doesn’t take long on a google search to find them.
Critics claim that
- The primary New Testament method of evangelism is preaching or proclaiming.
- Jesus and the apostles did not befriend sinners first and wait for a gospel sharing moment.
- Relational evangelism takes too much time and the urgency of the gospel is lost.
- The Apostle Paul did not bother with building a friendship with anyone before sharing the gospel with them.
- The unregenerate are enemies of God. They have no interest in spiritual things, even the reasons for your holy life.
- Relational evangelism makes the effective work of the Spirit of God dependent on something – the context of a relationship.
- Because they never get around to sharing the gospel because they value friendship over the good news, Christian believers fail at the Great Commission.
- Befriending the world violates the command to be separated from the world and avoid being unequally yoked. For example, James 4:4 “Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.”
Some of these are valid criticisms.
In this post, I want to address the biblical aspect of evangelism through relationships.
Let me re-frame the question in a different way:
Is there New Testament evidence of the gospel spreading through relational networks?
This is a question of context, not method.
Method will focus on the how (teach, preach, share), where as context focuses on the where and when.
Is there New Testament Evidence of Relational Evangelism?
Relational evangelism is focused on spreading the gospel through relational networks.
That might be through your current friendships.
That might be through intentionally making new friendships if you have been a Christian so long that you have no non-Christian friends.
Relational evangelism assumes that the believer is looking for God-given opportunities to talk about faith in the midst of existing relationships.
Read More: Divine Appointments
Relational evangelism is intentionally positioning oneself in a network of people for opportunity to share the good news.
9 Examples of Relational Evangelism in the New Testament
Let me lift up a few examples of how the gospel spread through personal relationships:
- Andrew brought his brother Peter to Jesus.
- Philip brought his friend Nathanael (John 1:40-51).
- The Samaritan woman told her whole town about her encounter with Jesus (John 4:28-42).
- The exorcised man from the Gerasenes went home and told his friends how much Jesus had done for him (Mark 5:19-20).
- Matthew invited his friends to a dinner party where they could meet Jesus (Matthew 9:10-13).
- Zaccheus invited many of his friends to a dinner party (Luke 19)
- Jesus was accused of eating with sinners and tax collectors (a relational experience).
- Peter spoke to Cornelius, but the whole household got baptized. Corneilus had brought them (Acts 10:24)
- Paul spent nearly two years talking faith with Felix. At the end of Acts 23, the apostle Paul was sent to Felix, the governor. Felix had Paul guarded in Herod’s palace (Acts 23: 35) until he had the chance to hear Paul himself (Acts 24). After the hearing, Felix gave Paul some ”freedom and permit his friends to take care of his needs” (24:23). Felix still got to hear of Jesus and the implications of being a disciple of Christ. These faith sharing conversations went on for the next two years (v.27).
Other New Testament Hints of Relational Networks
As I skim through the book of Acts, there is a lot of preaching and proclaiming, no doubt.
Luke’s focus is on the rapid spread of the gospel. Verbal sharing is a primary methodology.
But evangelism through relationships is hinted at in various places where social networks are in place.
It’s likely assumed, but not explicit, in Acts 2:26-47:
“The believers met together in the Temple every day. They ate together in their homes, happy to share their food withjoyful hearts.They praised God and were liked by all the people. Every day the Lord added those who were being saved to the group of believers.”
Members of the early church were known for their good works, being “highly regarded by the people.” (Acts 5:13).
At the same time, they were obeying God’s command to “tell the people the full message of this new life” (Acts 5:20).
After some of the healing stories, there is a phrase similar to:
“News about this spread around the town and people became followers.”
News spread through personal networks.
Healings were a triggering event that led to conversions at some point, though the text is not explicit in how people heard the content, in these cases.
Acts 13:44-49 shows how people spread the word to others after hearing Paul teach in the synagogue. They invited their friends the following Sabbath.
Acts 17:1-9 shows Paul going to the synagogue for 3 weeks to reason, debate, and explain.
Some people needed time, and one can assume that some friendships may have started.
Certainly, one can assume that the listeners talked among themselves between weeks about the message, including some who believed already.
As I read Acts, I’m struck at how the gospel spreads from friend to friend, through social networks.
People hear the message and then share it with their friends.
People hear the good news and invite their friends to hear the next weekend’s message.
People hear or see the life change in their friends. After considering it’s impact, want to know more and ask.
Read More: Is there relational evangelism in the Old Testament?
Can’t dismiss evangelism through relationships
If Christians withdraw themselves from the world, they will lose their relational connections with people apart from Christ.
They will lose an available means to credibly share their faith.
It could be that a healing triggers a spiritual curiosity to hear more (e.g, the woman at the well in John 4).
It could be that the teaching about Jesus triggers an invitation to a friend to hear more next week (Athenians in Acts 17).
It could be that God reveals himself to a leader who brings others to hear the message of the good news (Cornelius).
As a follower of Christ, I want to be in the place and time where I can share the good news with people.
Do you need help in Personal Evangelism?
Start here with this MP3 Download on Evangelism Training from the store to help you see where you need to grow.
In this 70 minute MP3 AUDIO recording on personal evangelism you will learn:
- How church invitations are part of evangelism
- How to discover and share your own journey to faith
- What you can say about the gospel message.
- How to personally lead someone to faith in Christ.
It’s a 70-minute audio file that takes just a few minutes to download, but it may help you answer the question:
What can you do in the next 90 days to grow in your evangelism skills?
What is relational evangelism?
Where in Luke 19 does it say that Zaccheus threw a dinner party for his invited friends?
Kelly,
Thanks for dropping, by. I’ve gravitated towards relationship evangelism as my primary style, because I’ve seen the impact that it makes in making disciples. I don’t neglect the more up-front contact evangelism (in fact, I teach it in mission schools), but I’m not sure how effective it is in helping resulting believers grow.
Is results the way we measure? That’s an entirely different question than what I’m addressing in this post – got to put that in the hopper for a future article.
I enjoyed reading about relational evangelism. I agree that we cannot dismiss evangelism through relationships and likewise we cannot dismiss evangelism because a deep relationship has not yet been established. The Word of God instructs us how to live in a world where some people do not love Him and do not love us. He tells us to love people. Everyone is made in Him image, although that image has been marred by sin. Romans 12.14-21 and 1 Peter 3.8-15 are two passages which deal with relationships with people. We should be ready for opportunities to share regardless of the relationship status and we should show the love of God to others in our relationships with them with the hope that they will one day get it.
The Bible shows us that different ways exist to preach the same Gospel, that those preaching another Gospel will be accursed, and to be glad that the Gospel is being preached… in whatever format : )
Matt:
You put a great point forward about the extreme of relational evangelism, and that is, lifestyle only. I agree with you on that, the famous quote supposedly by Assisi was wrong:
https://www.evangelismcoach.org/2009/did-saint-francis-of-assisi-get-it-wrong/
I am in agreement with that. Actions alone are not sufficient. In fact, actions are open to misinterpretation:
https://www.evangelismcoach.org/2008/is-neighborhood-outreach-evangelism/
I’m not sure an “Actions only” approach is an excuse as much as it is a fear of rejection, fear of the other person, or maybe even a lack of confidence in the gospel.
You’ve got the right direction I’m moving in: Share the gospel where God puts you. It’s evangelism where you live.
I think Jesus spent friendship time with the disciples, and it took them a long time to understand the gospel. Jesus spent time with Mary and Martha, spent time in the home of Pharisees, and spent meal time with tax collectors and sinners. I think he did evangelism where he lived, not just with the strangers who spoke to him.
Chris,
I appreciate your article. I have a few thoughts I want to share.
When I think of relational evangelism, I typically think of the quote “Preach the Gospel always, and if necessary, use words.”, often miss attributed to Francis of Assisi. This closely mirrors Matthew 5:16 that you shared in your “What is Relational Evangelism article. The problem is, people use this as an excuse to NOT share the gospel explicitly, which just isn’t Biblical. Keep in mind, this is not what I heard you say, it just how I think many others define relational evangelism. That definition is where i think many of the criticisms above are targeted.
I recently heard Mark Spence of LivingWaters.com address this very topic. Someone asked about sharing the gospel with a person they met at a coffee shop. I believe he said, if you feel like you to need to meet with them 16 times before you share the gospel, fine, but you’d better hope they don’t die after your 15th meeting. I believe he also addressed the fact that this takes significantly more time and less people can be reached.
I think your article talks about a relational evangelism that is about sharing the gospel wherever God puts you. Your workplace, softball team and neighbors all come to mind. I think this is absolutely Biblical. I think evangelism to those you have relationships will look somewhat different that evangelism to strangers. After all, you have to see these people in the course of your daily life. That does not mean though we should not be sharing our faith with those we do not have relationships with, or having relationships with people and not sharing the gospel.
Thanks for what you do.
Matt Case